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 Post subject: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 11:53 
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My dad recently died and none of my friends know, no body at my school knows.

I try to be the same happy Jon and I think its working.

But the thing is Im sick of it. I hate masking beign depressed all the time its not doing me good.

All sympathy from my mom and stepdad has gone. I think they think " give him a month and he will be better".

My grandapretns the only people that I dont feel sad around, Im not allowed to see alot becuase of a massive feud between my mom and gradaparents.

My sisters hate them aswell. One sister constantly on me about how they helped my dad mental health deterreite and how im becoming like them and how evil I am and such.


I have no one to talk to anymore my Dad was my best friend we used to spend hours talkign about anything.


It feels like Im alone in the world and no bodys seems to understand.


My form tutor has started to notice that im not all happy.


It helps having things on liek the TV and playing computer games becuase it takes my midn away from it.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 12:42 
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I can empathize, when I lost my mother, I also lost a good friend. I won't say time will make it better, but it will give you some perspective. I still get teary eyed thinking of my mother and that was 16 years ago. I remember how angry it made me when people said "if there is anything I can do..." No there isn't you can do so go away!! right?

You are not less of a person because you mourn him, it means you miss him which is natural and to your credit. It might even mean that he did a good enough job raising you that you have a reason to miss him. Respect his memory and experience that grief, but remember that he probably wouldn't want you to be down for long. Smile even when you don't feel like it. Try to recreate your life to embody those things that might make him proud. He is still with you.

Find a friend, seriously do it! Find someone with a sympathetic ear and pour out your heart and all the anguish to them. If they are a good friend they will let you do this. Get it out of your system, cry. Seriously cry, it will help. it will give you an outlet for your grief. your grief is finite even tho it may not seem that way at the moment. At some point you will be able to remember the good times without crying and THAT is what you need to do. Remember those good times, because those are the moments that matter the most.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 13:05 
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Your a nice guy. Thanks.


The thing is I want to tell some everything and I have lots of friends.

I dont go out anymore becuase I just dont feel like conecting with anyone. I used to go out every saturday and would try to stay out as late as possible to be with them.

The truth is I feel like I need to keep up the happy spirit of a person I was like.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 14:07 
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It is ok to be sad now. No one will blame you for it. That happy spirited person will be back and you will be a better person for it. For now it is ok to use your support system of friends and family. That is what they are there for, and surely you would support them if they had a sad time, correct? Let them do that. Be a friend to them by letting them be a friend to you.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 14:57 
Reginald Cuntypants
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Dag pretty much nailed it there.

Really sorry to hear about your dad. That must be pretty awful without living in an unstable environment. You can always just write your feelings down here. I know you've not been around for long, but sometimes it's just nice to know that somebody is reading it. If you're not comfortable with that you could even just write things down on a scrap of paper. The act of writing your feelings is proven to be very therapeutic. Just let it all flow.

Don't try to be who you think will be most likeable either. It'll destroy you. If your friends can't understand why you're a little quiet and moody then they're not your friends, they're just with you because you give them something. Not people worth trying to please to begin with.

Try not to let it bury you, but at the same time don't be afraid to just feel crappy.
The more the resist an emotion the more it persists. Once you've had some time indulging these feelings they'll become less severe.

Hope things even out for you.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 16:05 
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Thanks.

The problem Is I act like I usually do around them but inside I still feel like utter shit.

Its the comments at school that get me like. Isnt your dad a headteacher. And today my mate went on abut hwo awosme is dad is and I started to remember all the awsome stuff I did with my dad.


Dosnt help with the constant bickering between my sisters about everything.

See im the kind of guy who takes every hting at home like my sisters being horrible to me I take all of that and dont say a word and that really screws me up beacause I feel one day Im going to snap and it wont be preety.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 20:38 
Have you tried turning it off and on again
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Life goes on. That's all I can say. I've lost enough people close to me to know that. It might sound useless right now, but its the truth.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 20:40 
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crimsonred wrote:
Life goes on. That's all I can say. I've lost enough people close to me to know that. It might sound useless right now, but its the truth.


Your avatar ruins the implied sympathy of your psot.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 22 Sep 2009, 20:50 
Have you tried turning it off and on again
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True.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 23 Sep 2009, 02:41 
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hey robo, just out of curiousity, how old are you?

losing someone is one of the shitest situations to go through, but you've got to keep your head up. do your dad proud, like dag said, if you feel this rubbish about it, it's cuz he was that good of a man and a father that you want to make him proud of who you are. keep your head up mate, we're all here for ya man

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 24 Sep 2009, 16:39 
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Im 14 at the moment but I hate posting my age on forums it loses me credibility.

Dont double judge me now.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 24 Sep 2009, 18:04 
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not to be a grammar nazi, but your spelling pretty much gave it away.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 24 Sep 2009, 18:11 
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My dad cannot spell for shit, either. He spells worship with an "a". Warship. >.<


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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 24 Sep 2009, 18:15 
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damn and he can't even claim immaturity.... just eat up with the dumbass I guess

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 24 Sep 2009, 18:37 
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daniii's dad is a dumbass.

i can say that right cause this isn't technically her sanctuary thread?

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 24 Sep 2009, 18:58 
Reginald Cuntypants
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I believe so. And you're merely stating a fact rather than making slanderous suggestions. :giggles:

No worries with the age thing. I never liked to mention mine either for the same reasons. Age gives a general idea of how much life experience you've had but it's not entirely accurate - some people tend to go through more shit than others.

That's pretty rough losing your dad at such a young age. I guess that's the time in your life when you want your dad to be around the most. Not wishing to make things sound worse, but I can understand how it would make things harder.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 25 Sep 2009, 12:21 
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Thanks for that Darkstar.

Yeah I know what you mean. I think my stepdad dosnt really care about it becuase I think he thinks I should be getting over it more quickly like he did but he had his dad msot of his life and he got to say goodbye to his dad.


Oh and about my spelling its not because im a dumbass who cant spell its jsut becuase im shit at laptop keyboards.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 28 Sep 2009, 06:09 
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Darkstar wrote:
Age gives a general idea of how much life experience you've had but it's not entirely accurate - some people tend to go through more shit than others.


Knowing the age of a person who you are conversing with allows you to better understand the points that they are making because you can better empathize with them or what you assume their mindset to be. There is no reason to hide it, if you are an intelligent 15yo then you will come across as just that, just as it will show if you are a 15yo dumbass.
Both of you have a problem sharing your ages because of your own problems with accepting it or fear you wont fit in. No matter what age you are, if you make a valid point it would be recognized as just that. If someone dismisses you because of your age, that is their problem not yours..

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 01 Oct 2009, 15:24 
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Now im back at school I haev to deal with the banter and jokes.

Like dad jokes and shit. They dont know that he is dead and I feel like dying when someone says one.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 02 Oct 2009, 20:14 
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bro you're gunna have to tell them that your dad's passed. you can't really hide that and nor should you. just let it out, don't play that sympathy shit because you're better than that. let them know it's happened and they will support you when you need it and realise that they should let off the shitty banter.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 03 Oct 2009, 13:33 
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JDC wrote:
don't play that sympathy shit because you're better than that.

Since when? You're a shitcunt JDC.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 03 Oct 2009, 17:56 
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i know its stupid but I will find it hard to tell anyone at my school because alot of them are childish and will tell verybody then I will haev rumors about how my dad died and snide remarks I think id rather be masking my depression then having than.


Idk tbh :/

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 03 Oct 2009, 18:18 
Less is More
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it will come out at some stage. it's probably better to tell them straight up what happened rather than let rumours circulate.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 04 Oct 2009, 03:23 
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Meh then Id get more people making jokes out of me cause most of my year are basement dwelling assholes who never stop bitching on live.

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 Post subject: Re: I have started to become depressed.
PostPosted: 05 Oct 2009, 14:20 
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I can give you the secret I used to deal with my pain when I was your age. I just shut off completely so it wouldn't affect me and I could laugh at anything.

But we have two very different situations, it seems like you were fond of your father - personally I can't wait to cash in on mine.

The bottom line is when you have dealt with your grief you will be able to talk about it and not fall apart. Obviously, you haven't dealt with it. You are also young so it's pretty tough to deal with solo. I'd recommend you open up to a couple of people - you'd be amazed at the depth of compassion some individuals are capable of. Just choose wisely.

Hell, I even helped a homeless drunk to his feet yesterday when he face planted in front of me. I did wash my hands after though...

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