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 Post subject: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 10:33 
Bitchzilla
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Alright, so about 2 weeks ago i went to the free clinic close to here and got birth control, partially because it fucking bugs the shit out of me hot irregular i am and partially because i had a thing with a friend of mine and don't want a kid at 16.

Since then, i cut off the thing with this guy because i was asked out, and am now dating jake. I'm highly against cheating, so i stopped with the guy.

Now, about a week and a half into the birth control my half siblings went through my room and found the card in my purse for the free clinic. They promptly went around the house playing with it, and my mom found it.

**You might be wondering why i'm going behind my mom's back for bc.. it's because about a month ago i came home with a small hicky, about the size of a dime, and she freaked. Called me a whore, a skank with no self respect, what the fuck was i doing, etc. So i could only imagine what would happen if i asked her for bc**

The kids did this a day after her grandma died, and she was leaving for the funeral the next morning. She told me i was to get a doctors appointment when she got back, get a pap smear, and get bc through our family doctor. Well, she came home and didn't say anything about it.

I dropped it because i hate fighting with her about her views on me, and i had bc, and i wasn't having sex anyway.

I've currently got 6 days left, and i need more. Me and jake are close, we always have been, so we're comfortable, and yes, we had sex.

I'd rather not have to remember a condom, i know he's clean, and so am i.

My mom is against sex befor 18 and all that jazz. She doesn't want me to be like her. (she had me at age 17, so she's really worried about that)

It's really hard to get to the clinic with school and work, and going behind my mom's back sucks.

So, here's the question.. what do i do?

I can just stop using bc, and use a condom. Sit it out for another year and 3 months and get back on it when i'm 18.

I can talk to my mom, tell her i want it because i'm irregular and it's annoying.
(i know i'd be lying, but the wrath sent upon me if i told her it was because i was having sex would be above anything, so there's no question, i'd have to lie)

I can try to fit it in and go to the clinic.

Or.... option D.....?

Talking to my mom about sex is really really hard because every time i do she makes me feel like such a low piece of shit that i honestly believe i'm worth nothing. She will not put me on bc if she knows it's for sex.

Please remember this before answering.

**Oh, and as a side note, i know doctors can tell if you've had sex, but can they tell how many times?

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 11:08 
Creepy Old Man
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I don't know what your relationship is like with your mom, and apparently it isn't optimal (you are 16 afterall and these are not easy years for either of you, hopefully it will get better), but really, being honest is the best way to handle it. If she is adult enough to tell you to go to your family doctor then maybe she is ready to be cool about it. I know my daughters always freak out because they think I am going to loose my mind over shit that is just normal part of growing up (like the first time they got a "boyfriend" or their first kiss) They are always surprised that I am curious but not overbearing or condemning.

If she got pregnant young then chances are she doesn't want you to go through the hardships that she went through to raise a child at that young age. That is because she loves you, not because she is trying to make you feel like a skank or whore (you really need to get over that). The bottom line is that if you are having sex you need to take bc, if she stops and thinks about it, she will realize that by taking bc you are listening to her advice (not getting preggie) and are trying to be responsible about something you are going to do with or without her knowledge/approval anyway.

If you don't feel like you can tell her you are having sex, and in some cases that is best. then do have the discussion about your menstrual cycles. If she (or your sibs) find the new prescription she is going to assume the worst. Wouldn't it be better to be proactive and let her know you are taking it so it's not all "OMFG WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING!!!" when she does find out about it?

Good luck

oh and yes a dr can tell that you have had sex, but no they can't tell how many times or the frequency (within reason, if you are having sex on a daily basis things tend to...stretch and change...) well that is the best way to say it without comparing teh cooty to a roast beef sammich.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 11:36 
Slutty Mexican
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I have the feeling that your mother would be much more dissapointed in you if you get pregnant...so don't have sex without bc! personally, I don't trust condoms (even though I use them to prevent STD's), and I started taking the pill even before having sex for the first time, 'cause I thought it was the responsible thing to do, and to this day i feel proud of how i acted. I'm assuming here you don't have money to buy them yourself, so if going to the clinic it's too complicated, the only thing left to do is talk to your mom....u can tell her it's 'cause you are irregular, which i think is the sutil way of every teenage girl out there to tell their parents they are having sex (i mean, if your mom can add 2 plus 2 she'll probably realize your urge to get the pill is not REALLY 'cause you are irregular...). Or you can be honest about it and tell her this is something you've decided, and that u wanna talk to her 'cause you want to be as responsible as you can about it...it really just comes down to what you feel more comfortable with..i couldn't pretend i'm not having sex and feel guilty about it..but then again my mom aproached me when i was 15 and told me "here's the doc's number, for when u decide to have sex". So if you feel your mom is just gonna freak about it, maybe the trip to the clinic is worth it.

And that's all the advice i can give...good luck with that, and don't worry too much..16 is a complicated age

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 11:41 
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keep going to the free clinic for refils... if you want to be treated like an adult, act like an adult. Go get the pills yourself.

no they have no clue about how many times. and you can ask your family doctor to keep her out of the room while the doc see you. And the things dont stretch permanently. Its rediculiuos to think they a penis being in a vagina makes it loose. Some women are looser and some women are tighter, naturally or via excercise.

The skin will always come back to a certain size.

Fat chicks always have bigger vags than skinny chicks, kuz they are bigger.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 12:15 
Bitchzilla
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dageaux wrote:
If she got pregnant young then chances are she doesn't want you to go through the hardships that she went through to raise a child at that young age. That is because she loves you, not because she is trying to make you feel like a skank or whore (you really need to get over that).


Thing is i'm not exagerating. She calls me a whore because of a hicky. What is she gonna call me now? Despite how much i don't want to, i care what my mother says, and it gets to me. She talks down to me like that every EVERY time something like this even come up. (i.e. sex scene in some show. My other's response? "oh look emily, she's being a whore like you" or, Haha, it's you!" and she's being serious, don't mistake this for me being too sensitive.)

Thank you though. All of you. This is helpful.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 12:33 
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Number One: Kudos to you for taking the step and getting on bc to begin with. Thats very responsible and Im very glad you did that. We joke (myself included) about how young and immature you are but this shows another side.
**Our little girl is growing up**

You have to continue to stay on it. And, just in case you are not aware, it does take a couple cycles of being on it and taking the pills at the same time every night for it really to become effective. Remember that. Even though you've been on it for a month, sex with Jake is not truly protected yet.

No, the doctor can not tell how many times or how many partners you've had.

Your story with your mom is kind of similar to mine when I was young. My mom always told me when I was young that when I thought I was ready to have sex to tell her, she would get me on bc and not tell my dad and that she wouldnt be upset with me. Since I started having sex at 13, I obviously didn't want to tell her at that age so I waited. (Not a smart thing to do)
Anyway, by the time I was 16 I had a steady boyfriend and I just blurted it out to my mom in front of my friend that I was having sex and needed bc. She was dissapointed in me but never was upset. She said we would go to the doctor.
Like your mom, she put it off and we never went.

It wasnt until the next year maybe (I think I was about 17) when she actually took me to the doctor to get it only because I kept nagging her about it.

Its disappointing that your mom is acting that way with you but she has to accept that you are having sex and that at least you are mature enough to do the right thing and try to be protected. Maybe you can have that talk with her about how she did mess up when she was younger and although you have decided to have sex at a young age, you are being responsible and mature enough to try and prevent an unwanted pregnancy and she has to respect that.

If after that talk she doesnt bring you to the doctor then you find out who your family doctor is, take your insurance card from her wallet and make the appt yourself! Or just go back to the clinic. Either way, MAKE time for the appt and go.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 12:42 
Slutty Mexican
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BayouGirl25 wrote:

You have to continue to stay on it. And, just in case you are not aware, it does take a couple cycles of being on it and taking the pills at the same time every night for it really to become effective. Remember that. Even though you've been on it for a month, sex with Jake is not truly protected yet.



BULL. I asked my ginechologist about that urban mith, and she confessed it's just something they tell young girls, in order for them to take some more time to think about it. After about a week taking them you have the hormone levels where they should be in order to prevent ovulation (this doesn't mean they are 100% effective tho...)

If the hormone levels are not enough for your sistem (some pills come with less hormones than other), your menstruation won't stop, and you'll have to wait another cycle to try new pills.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 12:50 
Have you tried turning it off and on again
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Don't dump the condom...however much you think the other person's clean.DO NOT DUMP THE CONDOM! :)

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 13:05 
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just dont forget the pill, the condom sucks for guys, i hear it sucks for women too and will just make you enjoy sex less.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 13:06 
Creepy Old Man
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Anon wrote:
Its rediculiuos to think they a penis being in a vagina makes it loose. Some women are looser and some women are tighter, naturally or via excercise.

The skin will always come back to a certain size.

Fat chicks always have bigger vags than skinny chicks, kuz they are bigger.

then why do some vag look like a sweet mound of goodness and others look like roast beef sammichs? It isn't genetic because I have seen one go from nice tight little coochie of lubbin into a droopy drippy mess. Is that a function of age?

My current SO had to have a hysterectomy and had the coochie rebuilt due to medical issues (we have the technoolgy, we can make it better...stronger...faster...) and I am telling you her OBGyn needs a fucking nobel prize for that shit. Voodoo-punany FTW!

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 13:09 
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a hysterectomy means tying the tubes, you mean a vagioplasty? it can be termporarily stretched and relaxed.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 13:13 
Creepy Old Man
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ya whatever dude I have testicles I dont know what it all means, I just know 2 things.

A.) she can't any more children some kind of medical proceedure involving taking out her womb and repairing her vagina.
and
B.) that is the prettiest damned pussy I have ever seen.

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In almost every case a bullet is better than a lawyer.

I want to leave the world the same way I came in: naked, screaming, and covered in someone else's blood.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 13:40 
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I'm just gonna throw this out here because it seems to be completely missing. Birth Control gives heart attacks, aneurysm, weight gain, kidney and renal failure and a whole shit ton of other complications plus its only like 85% effective.


Save the fucking meds for a real problem and use condoms. They work really well, buy some KY if the dry thing happens and really research bc.

I'm not against bc but I am really against all the side effects especially when condoms are literally a "fire and forget" commodity. Yeah it's not as great, but you (probably) aren't even doing the fun stuff in sex yet so go with the condoms and the KY.

Just don't do the "pullout" method. I am sure every poster above is guilty of this, and the amount of stress that "oops...uhm honey..." causes is just nightmarish.

I get the whole wanting to normalize your cycle, but you are young and the real reason you are occillating is most likely stress and or other difficulties. Maybe see a shrink and get on some anti anxiety meds. I don't know...the pill is just really fucking awful in my opinion.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 14:07 
Creepy Old Man
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mzziqztixl wrote:
I get the whole wanting to normalize your cycle, but you are young and the real reason you are occillating is most likely stress and or other difficulties. Maybe see a shrink and get on some anti anxiety meds. I don't know...the pill is just really fucking awful in my opinion.

Wait...What? You are against using the pill for health reasons, but you are suggesting anti-anxiety meds for a pubescent female?

Common sense, it works, try it.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 14:47 
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Lol im far too disciplined to ever come inside a chick, ive been safely practicing the method for going on 10 years now and not scares yet. the pull n pray works, but the guy just has to be as scared of having kids as myself.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:08 
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Anon wrote:
Lol im far too disciplined to ever come inside a chick, ive been safely practicing the method for going on 10 years now and not scares yet. the pull n pray works, but the guy just has to be as scared of having kids as myself.


Be cautious there Anon. there are little sepages that come out during intercourse that can get a girl pregnant. I myself have used the pull out method ALOT. You can still get pregnant.

oh and just a side note, I was watching that new show on MTV yesterday, Sex with mom and dad, and Dr. Drew confirmed what I just said.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:16 
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Yea i saw that, but i hope you dont take sex advice from MTV.

As far as condoms go, dont come inside someone with a condom on.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:17 
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Anon wrote:
Yea i saw that, but i hope you dont take sex advice from MTV.


What?!?? who doesnt take advice from MTV.

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:30 
Have you tried turning it off and on again
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Anon wrote:
As far as condoms go, dont come inside someone with a condom on.


Doesn't that defeat the whole purpose...or atleast a part of it?

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:38 
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crimsonred wrote:
Anon wrote:
As far as condoms go, dont come inside someone with a condom on.


Doesn't that defeat the whole purpose...or atleast a part of it?


well, id rather actually enjoy the sex and pull out than cum in a chick and knock her up


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:48 
Bitchzilla
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BayouGirl25 wrote:
Number One: Kudos to you for taking the step and getting on bc to begin with. Thats very responsible and Im very glad you did that. We joke (myself included) about how young and immature you are but this shows another side.
**Our little girl is growing up**


You have to continue to stay on it. And, just in case you are not aware, it does take a couple cycles of being on it and taking the pills at the same time every night for it really to become effective. Remember that. Even though you've been on it for a month, sex with Jake is not truly protected yet.

No, the doctor can not tell how many times or how many partners you've had.

Your story with your mom is kind of similar to mine when I was young. My mom always told me when I was young that when I thought I was ready to have sex to tell her, she would get me on bc and not tell my dad and that she wouldnt be upset with me. Since I started having sex at 13, I obviously didn't want to tell her at that age so I waited. (Not a smart thing to do)
Anyway, by the time I was 16 I had a steady boyfriend and I just blurted it out to my mom in front of my friend that I was having sex and needed bc. She was dissapointed in me but never was upset. She said we would go to the doctor.
Like your mom, she put it off and we never went.

It wasnt until the next year maybe (I think I was about 17) when she actually took me to the doctor to get it only because I kept nagging her about it.

Its disappointing that your mom is acting that way with you but she has to accept that you are having sex and that at least you are mature enough to do the right thing and try to be protected. Maybe you can have that talk with her about how she did mess up when she was younger and although you have decided to have sex at a young age, you are being responsible and mature enough to try and prevent an unwanted pregnancy and she has to respect that.

If after that talk she doesnt bring you to the doctor then you find out who your family doctor is, take your insurance card from her wallet and make the appt yourself! Or just go back to the clinic. Either way, MAKE time for the appt and go.


Thank you.. that actually means a lot.

And everything else. Thank you

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“Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.”

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:52 
Bitchzilla
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Anon wrote:
As far as condoms go, dont come inside someone with a condom on.


...Why not?

And i'm not so sure i'm a fan of him pulling out and hoping i'm not pregnant at 16.. it's different for a 25 26 27 year old woman.. they can support, want, and tactfully care for a kid.

I can't.

I like kids, but i don't have the money, the time, or the resorces.

Pull and pray? not so much.




And why are you so against birth control dageaux??



I know about the risks, i also know it only takes about 2 weeks for it to fully work.

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“Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.”

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 15:56 
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mzziqztixl wrote:
I'm just gonna throw this out here because it seems to be completely missing. Birth Control gives heart attacks, aneurysm, weight gain, kidney and renal failure and a whole shit ton of other complications plus its only like 85% effective.


Save the fucking meds for a real problem and use condoms. They work really well, buy some KY if the dry thing happens and really research bc.

I'm not against bc but I am really against all the side effects especially when condoms are literally a "fire and forget" commodity. Yeah it's not as great, but you (probably) aren't even doing the fun stuff in sex yet so go with the condoms and the KY.

Just don't do the "pullout" method. I am sure every poster above is guilty of this, and the amount of stress that "oops...uhm honey..." causes is just nightmarish.

I get the whole wanting to normalize your cycle, but you are young and the real reason you are occillating is most likely stress and or other difficulties. Maybe see a shrink and get on some anti anxiety meds. I don't know...the pill is just really fucking awful in my opinion.


I think you should try not telling a 16-year-old not the take the pill...i have been taking it for over 2 years and i havn't gained a pound, and it's about 95% effective (actually is theoretically 100%, but manufacturers can't afford law suits, so they leave an error margin). The pill prevents cancer in women, and several complications in your reproductive system, and I've never heard it increases the risk of heart disease or aneurism (and i've read about it and talked to a few doctors...)


and everyone, stop using the pull out method! don't be stupid, just use a god damn condom.
Bayou is right, there's sth called pre seminal fuid, that comes before eyaculation; the sperm cound in is much lower, but there's still always a chance


----------------------------------



and don't use the "counting days" method either...many women ovulate more than once every 28 days

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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 16:19 
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EnleverJusteLeBord wrote:
Anon wrote:
As far as condoms go, dont come inside someone with a condom on.


...Why not?

And i'm not so sure i'm a fan of him pulling out and hoping i'm not pregnant at 16.. it's different for a 25 26 27 year old woman.. they can support, want, and tactfully care for a kid.

Pull and pray? not so much.

I know about the risks, i also know it only takes about 2 weeks for it to fully work.


well it takes semen to get a girl pregnant, 99.9999999999% of the semen and sprem is released while cumming, thus cumming outside a lady is far better than in one, regardless of whats holding it in.

Who the hell taught you about sex?

Condoms break, pulling and praying is 100% controllable. but if you want a condom to break and give you a little kid have fun with that.


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 Post subject: Re: Back Again..
PostPosted: 09 Oct 2008, 16:25 
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If pregnancy is your concern, pulling out is not the most reliable or forgiving form of contraception. Re-inserting your penis after you've ejaculated (outside the vagina) is not safe either. Within the first few hours after ejaculation, there is usually some sperm left in the urethra. The amount left behind is nowhere near the amount of sperm in the typical ejaculate, but it still presents a possibility of pregnancy.

Withdrawal does have its advantages. It's free and always available. Second, no side effects are associated with this form of contraception. The estimated failure rate for typical use is around 20 percent. When practiced perfectly, some researchers estimate the failure rate to be around 5 percent. This means 5 to 20 women out of every 100 who use withdrawal as their contraceptive method get pregnant.

For me its 100% over 10 years. Especially works well when combined with the pill.

While its not the best, it is not a BAD solution. Theres a big difference.

Just dont let him stick it back in after he cums, dont let him cum in you, and take your goddanged pill that you get from the free clinic.


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